Is it time?

I am weary and worn

Is it time to rest?

I am disappointed and depressed

Is it time to cheer up?

I am angry and frustrated

Is it time to forgive?

I am annoyed and lonely

Is it time to move on?

I am beaten and destroyed

Is it time to give up?

So sick of waiting for the years to pass by

Tired of hoping things will change

I just want to be “happy”

Whatever that means

Why is it I cant just satisfy?

Why must I constantly pursue this dream?

Because as far as I can see that is all it is

A hopeless dream, that we chase after our entire lives

Only to settle when we realize the dreams are unattainable

Is it time yet?

endlessly waiting for the sand in the hourglass of life to stop falling

TIME!!!!!!!

Misunderstood

They call her a slut, a player, a whore

But what do they know?

How can they not see that she is the one being used?

She cries herself to sleep at night begging for comfort

She just wants to be loved

She has been hurt so many times, she cannot recollect

She clings to the littlest signs of affection

She wonders what is wrong with her

She tries too hard then she plays hard to get

She falls easily only to be walked over

They always leave never staying long enough for closure

So willing to give what is left of her heart

Never receiving as much as a thank you

Love is a funny thing; it does not work if it is one-sided

Don’t judge her, she is just a repeated victim of cupid.

Chameleon

Who am I?

I don’t even know the answer to that question anymore.

I used to be the smart one, the cute one, thick one

What is happening to me?

I am growing into a person I don’t even recognize

When I look into the mirror now I see a total stranger

When did I stop caring?

It seems as I get older I am getting further away from the person I was.

I remember as a child the older kids looked up to me.

I was a role model at age six

I was number one in my class

Now among the population I am a lost statistic

I used to be one of those girls that drew the guys

But since anorexia is in I don’t even get a second look

I wake up each morning not caring who I will meet in the day

Because it’s not like anyone is looking at me

No one sees me anymore

They see my physical being

But my mind left my body years ago

Oh how I wish I wasn’t just a ghost looking on at my life

I feel like I have no control anymore

I just go through each day waiting

The life I live right now is not mine.

Loveless

Where are the good men?

I am starting to think they don’t exist.

Where are the ones that are looking for love?

Because so far all I can find are the horny ones.

Am I just a sexual object?

I really need to ask

When men see us, today they don’t see a person they see an available vagina

Am I just a garage for you to park your car?

Am I just rental space?

Our value over the generations has demeaned so much

Guys used to be nervous to ask if they could hold your hand on the first date

Now it is not even shocking for them to want sex after the movie

I want to have a relationship built not only on the physical

Is personality not important anymore?

I am tired of these men who don’t even call us by our names anymore

When did it become normal to call a girl,

A bitch or a hoe rather than a young lady

What is scary is that so many of us live up to these names.

We have allowed ourselves to become

nothing more than what these men see us as

I want a man who sees me

Someone who is more interested in my brain

Than what is between my legs.

I want to meet a man that comes to stay

Not the one on a mission to get into my pants

That will leave once he is done

I want to find a good man

Are they out there?

A Proud Black Man

When I first looked into your eyes,

I saw the ambition, pride, masculinity and strength of a true black man.

And all I could say was that I had to make you mine.

But unfortunately I didn’t see past my infatuation to the real you

You were the definition of an African American man alright,

Arrogant, cold and broken.

so dedicated to your job of proving you are better than the white man,

that you lost yourself in your work.

I tried to make you see how fun life could be,

But your life was just too busy for me.

Then you had the audacity to try and suck me into your world,

And make me like you

but I wasn’t willing to submit just to be with you.

As your life passes you by I sit and watch ,

That sparkle in your eye diminish

and all that is left is the shell of a man you have worked so hard to become.

It is that legacy that all black men share destined to be your downfall?

Your soul so beaten down by the past of your ancestors that you still cant stand up.

So burdened and hurt by this mental chain that you wear,

That you pass on this pain without noticing.

I see you but can you?

Can you see the person that you have become?

I doubt it for I would hope you would try and break yourself out of this trance you are in

But for now I will let you be what you want.

I just hope this distance that you have put between the new you

And the person you don’t want to be does not grow to long that you cant remember your roots.

With your intelligence there is no doubt that you will succeed,

I just hope your success can keep you warm at night after these long days you are sure to work.

I hope it will be enough to make up for all that you sacrificed to get what you wanted.

Successful men have many regrets but the proud ones have the most.

When I see you now you still have that gleam

But it is just a little dimmer than when we first met.

Not really family

Why can’t you just let me be?

I am tired of you trying to change me.

You make fun of me for the things I say,

And you only want me to follow your way.

You keep me locked up and expect I won’t be upset,

Now it’s apparent that you didn’t like me when we met.

You are slowly driving me insane by keeping me here,

And I know that there isn’t anything for me back home there.

But I miss my home, my friends and my life in general.

I just can’t pretend that none of it happened at all.

I don’t fit in here as you can tell from my nonexistent friends,

I am rapidly changing as my self esteem descends.

I feel left out and I am tired of being ignored,

I have grown tired of this life in fact I am bored.

Why do I have to change completely?

Why can’t I just keep part of me?

Why do you have to change everything?

Just leave me with something.

The wrong type

Tell me why is it women always like assholes?

Why is it only the jerks that speak to our souls?

Why can’t we give the good guys a chance?

Because obviously the bad ones don’t know anything about romance.

Why is it all girls like bad boys?

These are the same men that continue to treat us like toys.

They make you feel like you aren’t worth shit,

And still by their sides do we sit.

We all say we can change these men,

But the truth is they will stay the same to the end.

It is in our nature to this challenge chase,

But we should have learned by now this attitude is not a phase.

Why do we bother hoping for the best?

It wasn’t our job to clean up this mess.

From the beginning they were bad boys for life,

And don’t think that’s going to change because now your name is wife.

If a guy is an asshole that’s how he shall remain,

And the fact of the matter is all men are the same.

No matter where you look you will find bad in all,

But just hope it’s for the lesser of the evil that you fall